Your First 90 Days After a Layoff – What No One Tells You About Moving On

In this episode, we're getting into the harsh realities of the current job market and the emotional turmoil that follows a layoff. Whether you've been hit by corporate budget cuts, the tech industry shake-up, or the federal government downsizing fiasco, you're not alone. 

We address the grief, identity crisis, and stress associated with losing your job, and provide actionable advice for navigating the first 90 days post-layoff. 

Learn why panic applying is a bad move, the importance of setting a new routine, and how to strategically job hunt. By the end, you'll be more prepared to tackle your job search and find a role that's right for you. 

Check out the detailed show notes (https://tarakermiet.com/podcast/) and leave your thoughts or questions about today's topic. 

00:00 Introduction: The Harsh Reality of Layoffs
01:43 The Emotional Rollercoaster of Job Loss
02:39 Rebuilding After the Shock
03:33 The Layoff Hangover: Coping with Identity Loss
08:38 Creating a New Routine
09:57 Smart Job Searching: Quality Over Quantity
16:01 Navigating the Mid-Job Search Slump
17:03 The Pivot Moment: Making Strategic Decisions
22:43 Exploring New Paths: Freelancing and Entrepreneurship
23:41 Conclusion: Taking Control of Your Future

Need a little more balance and a lot more badass in your life? Check out my 1:1 coaching sessions designed to help you tackle your biggest challenges, manage stress, and create a personalized plan for success. Your first 30-minute session is free! Visit tarakermiet.com to get started. 

Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction: The Harsh Reality of Layoffs
• 2:29 The Emotional Rollercoaster of Job Loss
• 3:25 Rebuilding After the Shock
• 4:19 The Layoff Hangover: Coping with Identity Loss
• 9:24 Creating a New Routine
• 10:43 Smart Job Searching: Quality Over Quantity
• 17:31 Navigating the Mid-Job Search Slump
• 18:33 The Pivot Moment: Making Strategic Decisions
• 24:13 Exploring New Paths: Freelancing and Entrepreneurship
• 25:11 Conclusion: Taking Control of Your Future

Transcript

[00:00:00] Alright, let's talk about it, y'all. The job market is rough right now. If you've been laid off recently, whether from a corporate restructuring, budget cuts, or, let's be real, the absolute mess that's happening with federal government layoffs, you are not alone. And I don't mean that in the fluffy, you're not alone, we're all in this together kind of way.

I actually mean statistically, a ton of people are in the same boat right now. Tech companies, finance, healthcare, and even stable government positions. Nobody seems to be safe. It feels like every other day, another company is slashing jobs and LinkedIn has basically turned into a never ending parade of the, I was impacted by layoffs posts.

And if you're in this moment right now, if you just lost your job and you're sitting there in shock. Wondering what the hell just happened. Let me say this loud and clear. This is [00:01:00] not the end. I know it feels like it. I know it feels like someone just yanked your entire sense of security out from under you and left you standing there with nothing but a severance package if you were even lucky enough to get one.

And the worst part is no one really tells you what happens next. Sure, you're gonna get advice. People will tell you to take some time to process or start applying immediately. Someone in your life is definitely going to suggest freelancing like it's this magical solution to everything. But what no one prepares you for is how weird and disorienting the next few months are gonna be.

Because the first 90 days after a layoff, they're a complete mindfuck. It's not just about the job hunt. It's about grief. Identity loss, financial stress, and the terrifying realization that the stability you thought you had, it was [00:02:00] never really in your control to begin with. So today I'm going to walk you through what no one tells you.

The real stuff. Not the LinkedIn polished, I'm so excited about what's next version. The actual version that acknowledges that losing your job is hard. The job searching in this economy is soul crushing and it literally sucks. And that finding your footing again, isn't as simple as just sending out resumes.

But by the end of this episode, I want you to feel a little less alone and hopefully a lot more prepared because you will move forward from this. But the question is, how do you do it? And that's what we're going to talk about today. All right. So let's talk about what happens next, because no matter how much you thought you were prepared for this, whether you saw it coming or it hit you like a truck, the reality of actually being laid off as a whole different beast. At first, you might feel okay. Hell, you might even feel a little relieved.

Especially if your job had turned into a stress fueled [00:03:00] nightmare. Maybe you hated it. Maybe you were already job searching on your lunch breaks. Maybe you even told yourself that if I just stick it out a little longer, I'll figure out my next move. Well, the universe figured it out for you, friend. But then once the dust settles, once the initial shock wears off, you're hit with something no one really talks about.

The grief, the identity loss, and the absolute shit that is waking up without a job and realizing that you have no idea what to do with yourself. Welcome to the layoff hangover. It's messy, it's weird, and it's probably one of the hardest transitions you'll ever go through. Here's the thing.

We don't just work at our jobs. We build identities around them. I mean, think about it. For years, maybe even decades, your career has been this giant pillar of your life. [00:04:00] It gave you structure. It gave you purpose. It gave you a reason to wake up at a certain time, to get dressed, to log into work, to sit in meetings, yes, some of them pointless, and to contribute something to the world.

And now, poof, that structure is gone. And yeah. At first, having unlimited free time sounds amazing. You tell yourself, Ooh, I can finally sleep in. I can go for those midday walks. I can binge watch anything I want on Netflix without feeling guilty. But that novelty lasts about three days. Then you wake up one morning and you realize you have nowhere to be.

No emails to check. No Slack messages. No calendar invites. And suddenly, the thing that once gave your life a predictable rhythm has disappeared overnight. And your brain hates this. Because even if [00:05:00] you loathed your job, even if it drained the ever living life out of you, it still gave your life structure.

And when that structure disappears, your brain goes into full blown WTF mode. And if you're wondering, why do I feel like absolute garbage? Don't worry, you're not being dramatic. There's actual research that backs this up. A study published in the Journal of Occupational Health Psychology found that losing a job can trigger the same emotional and physiological responses as grieving a major loss, like a breakup or the death of a loved one.

Because in a way that's exactly what's happening. Your brain is grieving the version of your life that made sense. And then on top of that, you've got the stress response. Job loss spikes cortisol levels because your brain perceives it as a threat to your survival. So even though you're not technically being chased by a bear, your nervous [00:06:00] system doesn't know that.

It just knows that your source of stability, your paycheck, your routine, your sense of control, that has all been yanked away. So now, your body is flooded with stress chemicals. Your anxiety is through the roof. You're exhausted, but you can't sleep. Your emotions are all over the damn place. One minute you're fine, the next minute you're having an existential crisis while standing in the frozen food aisle at Target.

And then comes the who the hell even am I anymore moment. Because let's be real, our society is obsessed with defining people by their jobs. I mean what's the first question someone asks when you meet them? So what do you do? And suddenly you don't have a clean answer to that.

One minute you were, insert fancy job title here, at a company that used to pay your bills. And now, you're what? Unemployed? In transition? [00:07:00] A consultant because you added it to your LinkedIn in a fit of panic? It messes with your head. Because when you've spent years or your entire adult life building a career, it becomes part of your identity.

And when that's taken away, it's like staring at a blank space where who you are used to be. And this part is really uncomfortable. And if you're feeling it, I want to tell you right now, you're not crazy, you're not broken. You are going through a very real psychological shift, and it makes total sense that it feels like absolute hell.

So what the hell are you supposed to do in the first 30 days? Well first, let me tell you what not to do. First, don't panic apply to every job you see, please. Don't pretend that everything is fine and try to power through. And please, for the love of everything good, don't sit in your sweats doom scrolling LinkedIn for hours.

That's not going to help. [00:08:00] Here's what will. Give yourself a damn minute. I know, I know, you feel like you should be doing something. You feel like you don't have the luxury of just sitting with this. But listen, if you don't take even a few days to just process what happened, to let yourself feel it and acknowledge that this is a major life shift, it will catch up with you later.

Go for a walk. Journal. Call a friend and bitch. Hell, scream into a pillow if you need to. Just let yourself acknowledge that this sucks, because it does. Then, rebuild a new routine. This is huge. If you take nothing else from this episode, please take this. You have to create a new daily structure for yourself.

Not because you need to be hyper productive, but because having some kind of routine will keep you from spiraling into full blown existential crisis mode. [00:09:00] And start small with this. Wake up at the same time every day. Get dressed, even if you have nowhere to go. Set work hours for job searching and stop working after them.

And plan one thing for the middle of the day to just break up the monotony. Even if it's just making coffee at the same time every morning or going outside for 10 minutes, your brain will thank you for it. So yeah, the first 30 days after a layoff, weird, emotional. Messy, but also temporary. And if you actually take the time to process, to recalibrate, and get your head on straight, you'll be in a much better position to move forward.

So instead of just scrambling to land any job, you can actually figure out what kind of career and workplace will be right for you. Alright, take a breath. That was a lot. But we're not done yet because next we're going to talk about [00:10:00] what to do in the 60 days after a layoff. So you've made it through the first month. You've processed, or at least started to process, the emotional wrecking ball that is losing your job. You've felt the grief, wrestled with the identity crisis, and maybe even started piecing together some kind of daily routine so your brain doesn't completely melt into a puddle.

But now what? If you're like most people, this is the part where you think, all right, it's time to get serious. Time to get back out there and start applying for jobs like it's my full time job. And this is where things get dangerous. Because I need you to hear me loud and clear. Job hunting is not about doing the most.

It's about doing the right things. If you're a high achiever, then your knee jerk reaction to a layoff is going to be to treat the job search like an Olympic sport. Wake up early, make a to do list, redesign your resume again. Watch a webinar on networking, apply to 30 jobs before lunch, send a million LinkedIn connection [00:11:00] requests, work harder, hustle more, push through the discomfort.

Because that's what you've been taught, right? That productivity equals success. That if we just grind hard enough, we'll land on our feet faster. Except that's not how this actually works. The job search isn't a brute force game. You can apply to 500 jobs a day, but if you're just throwing your resume into the void, you're not job searching, you're actually just generating a bunch of rejection emails at scale.

And let's talk about those rejections for a second. Because nothing will make you feel worse about yourself than spending hours filling out an application, tailoring your resume, crafting the perfect cover letter, only 30 minutes. And that's when the spiral starts. Why am I not getting interviews? Am I not good enough? Maybe I need to completely redo my resume. Maybe I should apply to jobs I don't even want just to get something. And that's how burnout starts. [00:12:00] Here's the thing. Your brain is already exhausted from dealing with the stress of losing your job.

You've spent the past month in survival mode, navigating an emotional rollercoaster, trying to figure out who you even are outside of work. And now, you're trying to throw yourself into hyper productivity mode on top of that? Your nervous system is fried. In fact, research from the Journal of Career Development shows that intense High volume job searching actually increases stress and decreases motivation over time.

Because when you treat job hunting like a numbers game, every rejection, or worse, every deafening silence, feels like a personal failure. And when that happens repeatedly, it does not take long before you start feeling like complete garbage. So let's not do that, okay? I know it's tempting to send out as many applications as possible.

It feels like you're being productive. It feels like you're increasing your chances. [00:13:00] But in reality, applying to 100 jobs mindlessly is way less effective than applying to 5 to 10 jobs strategically. So instead of rapid firing applications at anything with a now hiring sign, please get clear on what you actually want.

Ask yourself these three questions. What kind of work do I want to do next? What industries or companies actually align with my values? Which, hint, this means you have to actually know what your values are. And then what's my non negotiable list for my next role? Maybe it's remote work. Maybe you need a healthy culture.

Maybe you want better work life balance. Get those figured out. Once you know those things, then you can tailor your approach. Research companies. Network with people inside those companies and personalize your application instead of blasting out generic ones. Networking and referrals are responsible for over 70 percent [00:14:00] of hires, not blind applications, not submitting resumes into the void.

So if you're not spending at least as much time building relationships as you are filling out applications, you're playing the wrong game. And the middle of the job search is where energy management becomes your most valuable skill. Because if you let this process consume you, if you're spending all your waking hours obsessing over applications, job boards, and LinkedIn alerts, you're gonna crash and burn hard.

So set boundaries. I mentioned this earlier. Pick a work schedule for job searching. Maybe it's three hours a day, four days a week. Maybe it's mornings only. But whatever it is, when your time is up, step away and take breaks. And I don't mean a quick doom scroll break.

I mean an actual break where you get outside, where you move your body or do something completely unrelated to the job hunt. [00:15:00] And stop checking LinkedIn every five seconds. Seriously, those seen by recruiter notifications, they are not worth your mental health.

Job searching is not a full time job and treating it like one will just drain you faster. Lastly, if you measure success only by whether you've landed a job yet, this whole process is going to feel like failure after failure after failure. Instead, start tracking small wins. Did you send an email to connect with an old colleague?

That's a win. Did you get feedback on your resume from someone in your field? That's a win. Had a networking chat that didn't suck? I'll call that a win. Didn't spend the whole day spiraling in self doubt? Huge. Freaking. Win. Progress doesn't just mean landing the job. It also means building momentum, learning about new opportunities, and keeping yourself mentally in the game.

So [00:16:00] here's where we're at. You've made it through the emotional crash of month one. You're avoiding the productivity trap now in month two. You're job searching smart, not just hard. But now, We need to talk about what happens when the job search drags on a little longer than you expected. Because this market is tough.

Hiring cycles are slow. And by month three, that's when the real test happens. Because that's when doubt starts creeping right back in. At this point, the shock has worn off in month three. The panic has settled mostly. It may start to resurface here now and again. But you've been on the job search game for a solid two months now.

Maybe you've had some interviews. Maybe you've even made it to final rounds. Maybe you've been ghosted by recruiters so many times that you're starting to wonder if you need an exorcism. And now this is the part where you start asking yourself, Okay, [00:17:00] so what now? This is what I call the pivot moment, because this is where things get real.

This is where you start making decisions that will shape your actual future, not just your I need a job immediately panic mode future. This is where you stop operating from fear and start figuring out what's next in a way that actually makes sense for you. But first, let's talk about why this stage feels so damn hard.

If we're being honest with each other, I'm sure you thought you'd have a job by now. When you first got laid off, maybe you told yourself, okay, this sucks, but I'll land something in a couple of months. Hell, even advice tells you to have kind of three months of savings saved up. But now the clock is ticking.

Your savings account is getting real judgmental. And every time someone asks, so how's the job hunt going? You have to resist the urge to either flip a table or cry uncontrollably. And I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but this is normal. [00:18:00] The average job search in today's market takes at least five to six months, and for higher level roles, it's even longer.

And even if you're doing everything right, let's say you're networking, you're tailoring your applications, you're really good at interviewing, there's still a good chance that you're dealing with hiring freezes, budget cuts, and comically slow corporate decision making. So if you're sitting there thinking, why haven't I landed something yet?

Let me just say, it might not be you. It's probably the market. But also, this is a critical moment. Because month three is where you're most likely to start spiraling. This is where people start making desperation moves. They accept jobs they know they don't want. They lower their standards just to get something.

And they start questioning their worth. And that is not what we're going to do, okay? Instead, this is the moment where you need to [00:19:00] pause, breathe, and pivot with purpose. By month three, you're likely staring down these three paths. Keep going in the same direction. So you've been targeting a certain type of role in a certain industry with a certain salary and you're committed to staying the course on that.

Number two, switch things up. Maybe you're realizing that maybe it's time to pivot. Whether that means a new industry, a new type of role, or just a different way of working all together. And then number three is burn it all down and start over. You're over it. You're questioning everything at this point.

You're thinking about freelancing, about starting a business, going back to school, moving to a cabin in the woods. Whatever it takes to never have to sit through another awkward Zoom interview again. Whichever camp you fall into, there's no wrong answer, necessarily. But what is important is making a conscious choice instead of a reactive one.[00:20:00] 

So let's break these down. If you're thinking, I still want to land the kind of job I've been searching for. I just need to keep pushing. Great. But now's the time to refine your strategy. This means reevaluating your applications. Are you applying to the right roles or just anything that seems remotely close?

Are you taking the time to tailor each application or are you just sending out a generic resume and hoping for the best? Also, look how you're leveraging your network and do this more aggressively. At this point, referrals are your best friend. If you haven't reached out to your full network, do it now.

People want to help you, but you have to ask them. And lastly, check in on how you're following up. Are you doing it strategically? If you've applied somewhere and you've heard nothing, don't be afraid to check in. If you've interviewed and you haven't gotten an update, follow up with confidence. People are [00:21:00] busy, hiring is slow, and sometimes just a little nudge makes all the difference.

Maybe you're realizing that you don't actually want to go back to what you were doing before. Maybe you've really been in this process long enough now to see that your industry's a mess. Your role was burning you out in the first place, or you've just outgrown what you used to do. If that's you, this is the perfect time to pivot with intention.

Start asking yourself three questions. First question, what are my transferable skills? Because you probably have way more than you actually think. You just have to spend time on identifying them. Question number two, what actually excites me? What parts of my old job did I love? And what do I never want to deal with again? And that third question is what industries are growing? If your field is struggling, where else could your skills be useful? This is also a great time to explore upskilling. But let me be clear here.

[00:22:00] Do not sign up for random certifications just because you feel stuck. And do not go back to school out of panic. Education is great. I am a former educator. But unless you know it's going to get you where you want to go, don't drop thousands of dollars on a career pivot without a clear plan. Instead, start talking to people who already work in the roles or industries that you're curious about.

Informational interviews are gold in this stage. You'd be amazed how much clarity you can get just by talking to someone who's already in the space you're considering. And then there's the third option. The maybe I don't even want a damn job anymore option. The what if I just started my own thing option.

And listen, if that's where you're at, it's not a bad thing. Sometimes layoffs are the push we didn't know we needed to go after something new. But before you [00:23:00] throw your entire career in the trash and declare yourself a full time entrepreneur, give yourself a reality check. Do you actually want to run a business or do you just hate the job search?

Do you have a financial runway to experiment or do you need to bridge the gap with something a little more stable first? And are you choosing this from a place of clarity or just because you're sick of rejection? If you're serious about freelancing, consulting, or starting something new, now's the time to start testing the waters.

Pick up a few small projects. Talk to people who've done it. Start building the foundation before you make the full leap. So here we are, month three and beyond. This is where you stop reacting and start choosing. This is where you decide if you're staying the course, making a shift, Or stepping into something new altogether.

But the most important thing you are still in [00:24:00] control, even if it doesn't feel like it right now, even if the process has been frustrating, exhausting, and the most discouraging experience you've ever gone through, you are still in control because layoffs might've taken away your last job, but they do not define what comes next.

And that's where your power lies. All right, friend, that's it for today, but before I go, if this episode resonated with you at all, let me know, send me a message, share it with a friend who needs to hear it, or just take a second to remind yourself that you've got this until next time, stay balanced, stay bad ass, and I'll catch you in the next episode.