Job Changes Don't Erase Burnout

Think quitting your job will erase burnout? Think again. In this episode, we dig into the lingering effects of burnout even after you’ve left a toxic work environment. 

Learn about burnout aftershocks, rebuilding your sense of safety, and the slow, steady path to true recovery. 

We’ll explore how to recognize and rewire your burnout DNA, reclaim your value, and design your work-life balance with intention. Featuring tips on setting boundaries, mental conditioning, and building a supportive network, this is your guide to transforming burnout into sustainable success.

Check out the detailed show notes (https://tarakermiet.com/podcast/) and leave your thoughts or questions about today's topic.

Need a little more balance and a lot more badass in your life? Check out my 1:1 coaching sessions designed to help you tackle your biggest challenges, manage stress, and create a personalized plan for success. Your first 30-minute session is free! Visit tarakermiet.com to get started. 

Chapters

• 0:00 The Lingering Effects of Burnout
• 1:17 Understanding Burnout Aftershocks
• 2:23 Rebuilding a New Baseline of Safety
• 2:57 The Physiological and Mental Recovery
• 10:13 Identifying and Addressing Burnout DNA
• 13:41 Reclaiming Your Sense of Value
• 15:41 Redesigning Your Work and Life
• 20:25 Building Your Support Squad
• 22:58 Sustaining Recovery

Transcript

[00:00:00] 

Leaving a job that burns you out doesn't automatically make you feel better. You think it will and you hope it will. You tell yourself that once you're out of there, you'll finally have energy again and get back to feeling like yourself. But when the dust settles, something still feels off. You're in a new role with new people, maybe even better payer hours, and yet the exhaustion kind of lingers.

You still wake up tired, you still second guess yourself, and you still can't fully relax. That's what I call burnout aftershocks, and it's the part that nobody really warns you about, the part that lingers after you've already escaped. It's not the fire itself anymore, but it is the smoke that's still sitting in your lungs.

That's because the hard part of leaving isn't the only work that's needed. You still have to address the actual burnout part, the actual system problem. You see burnout, rewires how you think, how [00:01:00] you process stress, and how your body reacts to pressure. You can leave the toxic culture, the shitty boss, and the impossible workload.

But if your nervous system is still running on high alert, your body doesn't know that you're safe yet. So it's still waiting for the next hit. So even when the new job is fine, maybe even great, your brain doesn't trust it yet you are still scanning for red flags. You're still taking on too much because it feels easier than disappointing someone and you're still trying to prove your worth even though no one's asking you to.

That's why you need to do the work of rebuilding a new baseline of safety, and you can't shortcut that part either. It's slow, boring work. It's eating real meals at real times, not skipping lunch because you lost track of time. It is saying no to that extra project, even when your old habits tell you that it's risky.

And it's realizing that recovery [00:02:00] isn't about becoming your old self again. Leaving the job was just step one friend. Healing from what the old job did to you is where recovery begins. So let's start with the fact that burnout changes you. It changes your brain chemistry, your stress response, your decision making, your confidence, all of it.

When you've been living in survival mode for a long time, your body and your brain adjust to that environment. They learn to function in chaos. So when you remove the chaos, your system doesn't automatically just snap back to calm. It actually gets confused. You might feel restless in the quiet. You might crave stress because your brain is still wired to equate that adrenaline with purpose.

You might even start sabotaging yourself a little, taking on too much, staying late, or over preparing, not because you necessarily want to, but because that rhythm [00:03:00] feels familiar. That's the residue of burnout. The way it hijacks your sense of safety, you're technically out of danger, but your body's still scanning for those threats that just don't exist, and this is why people so often end up recreating the same patterns in new jobs.

They're not intentionally walking into another stressful situation. They're just following what feels familiar, the pace, the pressure, that constant urgency. Those are things that start to feel like home after a while. So one of the first steps in recovering from burnout after a job change is realizing that your body and your mind are on two very different timelines.

Your mind might logically understand that you've moved on, but your body's still back in that conference room with a tight chest, the clenched jaw and the unread emails piling up. That's why your recovery has to start at a physiological level. And no, I don't mean spa [00:04:00] days or bubble baths, although those are great, don't get me wrong.

But I mean the slow steady stuff, the unsexy kind of consistency that teaches your system, that it doesn't have to brace for impact anymore. Pick one thing, meals, sleep movement, maybe rest and make it predictable. Eat breakfast around the same time. Go for a short walk after work instead of collapsing into doom scrolling.

Get in bed when you say you will. It sounds simple, of course, but this is how you start rebuilding safety in your body

because when your body can trust that, you'll feed it, rest it, and move it regularly. It starts to loosen its grip, it stops running. Constant background scans for danger. And that's when recovery starts to stick. Not when you finally take a vacation, but when your system learns that calm isn't a trap, it's a signal that you're okay.

And once your body starts to believe that your mind can finally follow. [00:05:00] Speaking of your mind, we have to talk about the mental part too, because even in a new job, you might notice your old pattern sneaking in. You're still checking your email at midnight. You're still afraid to say no. You're still scanning for signs of a toxic boss, even when your new boss is actually pretty solid.

Basically, your brain is replaying old scripts that once kept you relatively safe. When you've spent years equating performance with protection, your brain learns that being hypervigilant and over-prepared is what keeps the floor from falling out. You don't trust calm because the last time things felt calm, that was right before the next storm.

So now you micromanage yourself. You stay one step ahead, not because anyone asked you to, but because uncertainty feels dangerous and you can't outthink that pattern. You can't just tell yourself to just chill. When your brain's been wired to believe that relaxing means risk. Logic doesn't [00:06:00] fix conditioning, repetition does.

You have to retrain your brain the same way you'd rebuild a muscle that's been overused and inflamed. Slowly, intentionally, and through proof. So here's where you start. Every time you feel that familiar urge to over-function, pause long enough to ask yourself, what am I trying to protect here? Most of the time it's not about the task at all.

It's about avoiding a feeling, maybe disappointment, rejection, judgment, or perhaps loss of control. That's the fear that drives the behavior. Once you can see it, you can start replacing it. Instead of proving your worth through constant output, prove it through outcomes. Instead of anticipating everyone's needs to stay safe, get clear on your actual role, and let that be your guardrail.

This isn't about adopting a new mindset, it is about drawing new boundaries that your nervous [00:07:00] system can believe in. Because the truth is most people leave their job but keep the operating system. They upgrade the scenery, but the code underneath is still running the same way. Still optimizing for survival, not sustainability.

Real recovery means rewriting that code. It's teaching your brain that being competent doesn't require being consumed, and that safety doesn't come from over performance. It comes from self-trust. Hmm.

Now, once you start catching those mental patterns, something else usually bubbles up underneath them. Grief, and lemme tell you, that's the part of this recovery process that no one really prepares you for because no matter how much you want and need to leave that job. It's still a loss, loss of time, energy, confidence, maybe even identity.

So you start realizing how much of yourself you gave away, trying to keep everything afloat. You remember the version of you who used to have hobbies or [00:08:00] laugh more or sleep through the night, and for a minute it's disorienting because you're finally out, but you're not the same person who went in.

That's the emotional aftershock of burnout. It's what happens when your system stops surviving long enough to start feeling again. And if you're wired, like most high performers, your instinct will be to just rush past this part. You'll tell yourself to focus on the positive, be grateful for the new job, and keep moving forward.

And that's certainly good. But here's the thing. Moving on too fast, just buries what still needs to be processed. Grief is not weakness. It's your body's way of integrating the experience so it doesn't keep leaking into your future. It's your nervous system saying that you need to acknowledge what that costs you before you can let it go.

So let yourself feel it. The frustration, the sadness, even the anger at how long you stayed or how much you tolerated. You don't have to wallow in it, but [00:09:00] you do have to name it because when you do, it loses its grip, and that's when recovery starts to shift from reaction to rebuilding.

Once you've allowed yourself to feel the cost, you can start designing your next chapter from clarity instead of fear. You're no longer building your boundaries around trauma. You're building them around truth. And that's when you stop trying to get back to who you were before burnout and start becoming who you were supposed to be all along.

So once you started rebuilding, the next step is figuring out why you burned out the way you did. Because burnout doesn't show up the same way for everyone.

It has its own fingerprint. Your personal burnout. DNA is made up of the specific conditions, beliefs, and behaviors that shaped how it happened and why it lingered. This is where a lot of people get stuck. They start feeling a little better and think, okay, I just need to set stronger boundaries next time.

But that's surface level. Boundaries are a tactic, not a [00:10:00] diagnosis. You can't rebuild something sustainable until you understand what actually drove your burnout in the first place. For most people, there's a mix of external and internal drivers. The things your workplace created and the things that you maybe unconsciously like co-signed.

That doesn't mean that you caused it. It means that there were patterns in play that you need to see clearly. If you want to stop repeating them. So start by looking at your conditions, the environment that surrounded you.

Was it chaotic, under resourced, or constantly changing? Did you have clarity or were you set up to fail from day one? These factors shape how much pressure your system was under and how hard it had to work just to function.

Then there's culture, the invisible rules about what it takes to belong. Maybe your workplace rewarded burnout behaviors like late night heroics, that always on kind of responsiveness, even the expectation of [00:11:00] availability. If the culture equated exhaustion in some way with dedication, then you probably learned to normalize depletion.

Next comes convictions, your internal programming. These are gonna be the stories that you tell yourself about what it means to be a good employee leader or person. Maybe it's that you can't let anyone down, or if you're not needed, you are not valuable. These beliefs are usually what keep burnout going long after the job ends.

Then there's choices, the daily decisions that either protect or drain your energy. Saying yes, when you mean no. Overriding your own limits, ignoring the early signs that something's off because you don't wanna be difficult. And finally, there's capacity. Your bandwidth, the physical, emotional, and cognitive limits that define what you can realistically handle.

Burnout often happens when you treat capacity, like a suggestion instead of a [00:12:00] constraint when your output grows, but your recovery doesn't. Together, these five areas, conditions, culture, convictions, choices and capacity. Form the blueprint of your burnout. They explain how you got there and what patterns you are most vulnerable to repeating.

When you can see your burnout, DNA, clearly everything changes. You stop fighting the symptoms and start addressing the structure. You recognize your early warning signs faster. You notice the environment that bring out your worst habits, and instead of walking straight into another round of overwork and resentment, you can actually design your work and your life around the way you're wired to thrive.

That's the work of resistance. It's not about never feeling stressed again, that's not realistic. It is about though knowing yourself so well that stress doesn't have the same power to consume you.

And once you understand what drives your burnout, the next step is reclaiming your sense of value. [00:13:00] Burnout strips that away quietly. Not just your energy but your confidence. You start questioning your competence, downplaying your accomplishments, and second guessing everything. That's the loss of efficacy piece of burnout.

The feeling that no matter how hard you work, it never adds up to enough rebuilding. That starts with remembering that your worth was never the problem, the environment was. You are trying to prove value inside a system that only measured output. Now it's about redefining value on your own terms. Ask yourself, what do I do that actually creates impact?

What strengths come naturally to me that I've been overlooking? When you can name those things, you start separating your worth from your workload. Owning your unique value is what breaks the last chain of burnout. The need to constantly earn your place, because once you trust your value, you stop overworking to prove it.

You stop chasing validation that's not coming, and that's when you finally [00:14:00] start working from self-respect instead of self-preservation. Now at this point in recovery, you've rebuilt enough clarity and confidence to stop reacting to your burnout and to start redesigning how you work. This is where agency comes back online because burnout doesn't just strip your energy.

It also strips your sense of choice. Redesigning your work is about reclaiming that choice, reshaping your role, so it aligns with who you are now. Not who you were when you burned out. Think of this step as a form of job crafting, intentionally shaping your tasks, relationships, and perspective to create a healthier, more energizing fit between you and your work.

You might not have control over everything about your job, but you'll almost always have control over something and those small points of agency add up. The way I teach this is through the lens of the three is influence, investment, and integrity. Influence is about [00:15:00] reclaiming what's within your control.

During burnout, everything starts to feel dictated. Your schedule, your workload, even your reactions. But when you zoom out, there's always levers that you can pull. You may not be able to change the org chart, but you can change how you prioritize, how you communicate, and how you manage your energy.

Influence is about identifying those levers and using them on purpose. So ask yourself, where do I actually have room to make some small adjustments that make my day more manageable and meaningful to me? Now, investment is about choosing where your effort goes and making sure it matches what matters.

Burnout happens when your energy gets poured into things that don't align with your values or your strengths. So redesigning your work means redistributing that effort. Which tasks actually play to your strengths? Which relationships or projects give something back to you? Maybe that's growth, connection, or even purpose.

This isn't about working less. It's about working differently. [00:16:00] When you invest your energy with discernment, your capacity stretches further because it's not constantly being drained by misalignment,

and then integrity is the anchor. It's the point where your work and your values finally line up again. When you're burned out, you often end up doing great work that doesn't feel good because it's out of sync with what you believe in. Redesign means realigning. You start asking, does this still reflect what I stand for?

Does this decision, this project, or this pace align with the kind of leader or professional that I wanna be? That's what keeps you from slipping back into self betrayal, disguised as dedication. When you combine job crafting with these three eyes, you stop treating your job as something that happens to you and start treating it as something you can shape.

Once you've redesigned how you work, the next step is expanding who you are outside of it. Burnout doesn't just drain your energy, it collapses your identity. Until work becomes the only place that you measure [00:17:00] your worth. So part of recovery is reclaiming the rest of your life and giving your nervous system new ways to experience meaning mastery and joy.

Cultivating non-work passions isn't about balance in the time management sense. It's about creating emotional diversification, giving yourself multiple places to feel capable and fulfilled so that your job isn't carrying the entire load of your identity. When all your validation lives in one arena, it only takes one bad quarter, one difficult boss or one failed project to shake your sense of self.

So start small. Explore things that have nothing to do with productivity or professional growth. Hike, bake, volunteer, garden, paint, hell learn guitar, whatever pulls you into flow without performance pressure. The goal isn't to be good at it. The goal is to feel human again. These activities help recalibrate your nervous system, [00:18:00] build new neural pathways for joy, and remind you that your value doesn't begin or end with your title and your non-work passions can often reveal the pieces of you that burnout buried the part that likes to create, connect, explore, or nurture the part that's been waiting for permission to exist again.

When you feed that side of yourself, your capacity for work expands naturally because your life isn't one dimensional anymore. The step is where sustainability really takes root. You stop trying to escape work and start balancing it with experiences that refill you. You stop seeing rest as a reward and start treating it as maintenance, and most importantly, you start building a life that can hold your ambition and your wellbeing, not one that forces you to choose between them.

Now the final step in burnout recovery is realizing that you were never meant to do this alone. Burnout thrives in isolation In the moments when you convince yourself that no one else would [00:19:00] understand, or that asking for help means you're weak or that you're the only one who can hold it all together.

Recovery on the other hand, happens in connection. Building your support squad is about surrounding yourself with people who reflect the healthiest version of you back to yourself, not the overextended over-functioning one that you're trying to outgrow. These are the people who remind you what enough looks like when you forget.

I teach this through five core roles. The role model, mentor, coach, cheerleader, and sponsor. A role model shows you what's possible. Someone living proof that balance and success can coexist. A mentor offers wisdom and perspective. Someone who's a few steps ahead and can help you see patterns that you might miss.

A coach helps you turn that awareness into action, holding you accountable to the changes that you say you wanna make. A cheerleader brings the emotional boost, the person who [00:20:00] celebrates those small wins and reminds you of your progress when your inner critic gets loud and a sponsor opens doors. The person who advocates for you in rooms that you aren't in yet, you don't need all five at once, and they don't have to come from work.

Some might be friends, peers, or even online communities. The point is to diversify your sources of support so that no single relationship or workplace carries all the weight. When you build your support squad intentionally, you create a safety net for both your ambition and your wellbeing. You have people who check your blind spots, hold you to your boundaries, and remind you of your worth when burnout whispers otherwise.

This step closes the loop on recovery because it anchors your growth in community. You're no longer trying to sustain yourself on willpower alone. You are sustained by connection, accountability, and belonging. That's what makes your progress stick. By the [00:21:00] time you reach this point, you've done more than recover.

You've rewritten your entire relationship with work identity and energy, but burnout, recovery isn't a finish line. You don't cross some invisible line and suddenly become burnout proof. You just start operating from a steadier foundation, one built on awareness agency and alignment.

Integration is where everything you've learned stops being a process and starts being a practice. It's not about rigid routines or perfect boundaries. It's about knowing what throws you off balance and being able to recalibrate before the spiral starts. You begin to catch yourself faster, noticing when old patterns show up, when your energy dips, when your thoughts drift back into survival mode, and you respond with curiosity instead of judgment.

At this point, you're no longer chasing balance. You're creating it as you go. You're making decisions that support your wellbeing in real time, not waiting until you've hit a wall. You [00:22:00] understand that sustainability isn't static. It flexes with you. Some seasons will stretch you, but now you know how to expand without snapping.

The deeper shift is this. You stop defining success by how much you can carry and start defining it by how fully you can live. You start designing your career and your life around what fuels you, not what drains you, and you recognize that protecting your capacity isn't a luxury. It's leadership. This is what life after burnout looks like.

Not a perfect equilibrium, but an ongoing conversation with yourself. One where you lead with awareness, act with intention, and know how to return to center when the world inevitably pulls you off course. The real transformation isn't that you've learned how to avoid burnout, it's that you now recognize the early whispers before the crash.

You notice tension before it becomes pain. You recognize misalignment before it turns into resentment. You've developed a level [00:23:00] of self-awareness that makes burnout harder to hide behind, and easier to prevent this new version of you, the one who protects their capacity, who honors their values and designs, work around who they are instead of who they think they should be.

That's the foundation of a burnout resistant life. Not perfect, not invisible, but balanced and badass on purpose.